I Turned down sex. WTF ??

Something happened last night I’d have thought would NEVER happen.

I turned down sex. Sex was put, on a plate, in front of me by a good looking girl….with a good body…. That I like. And I put her in the friend zone. Hahah. WOW. You know? What happened?

Ok – not just any girl. A girl I specifically re-opened on FB to try and fuck. Remember I mentioned how I sent a girl that message… “hey I you’re one of my facebook “Friend”s I don’t know anything about…so tell me….”

And I asked her 4 questions? Well we went back and forth for AGES (the biggest message I’d ever written) …. But it was all real. Like, no game, just us spilling our guts to each other and shit. We have yoga, spiritualism in common. She’ all into re-incarnation and shit too. I’m gonna call her enlightened girl. Or Egirl. No wait… HB_Eg. anyways, HB_Eb and I spoke on the phone a couple of times and I was very c&f. just accusing her of trying to seduce me and get in my pants etc. whenever I said anything poigniant … pointed out one of those things guys are not “Supposed to say” she’s reply “y0u’re funny!”

ANywho… the game elements I applied were just non needyness, C&F.. that’s it. She was super busy and wasn’t taking the steps to meet up with me around 2 weeks ago. I tried to meet up but she was too busy. Did I let it bother me? Nope. All I did was send her an awesome message, with my number in…. saying “ok, let me know when you’re free!”

And then I stopped messaging for a few days. Let her miss me a bit. She’s write me a long one…. And eventually I’d reply. This went on for a bit, and then finally I got a text. “Can you guess who this is?” … so of course I messed around acting like I didn’t know which girl it was. I named like 4 different girls before getting to her. Hehe. So, I just kept it fun on text but didn’t really try and meet up with her. I waited till she asked me. Eventually she said “are you free on thur?” and I was like “I can fit you in….” and she came over. We watched kung fun, talked about spiritual shit and played poker. What a cool girl!

Unfortunately, I’ve been getting fucked so good by hbkarate I really just didn’t see the point. Why? What’s the reason? The sex isn’t going to be better than what I’m already having … I know this. I’m not as attracted to this girl either. We may have more in common. But the attraction just isn’t as strong. I actually didn’t feel the need to sleep with her. I love how at this point in my life, I’m justifying when I’m not gonna sleep with a girl. like I HAVE to sleep with any hot girl I can. What the fuck is that? I think PU has made me weird. I have to sleep with every fucking hot girl now?? What?? Since when? I actually opened up to this girl about all this. I told her how many girls I’ve been with etc etc… how I’ve stopped seeing girls as anything but sexual objects etc etc. she listened. She still wanted to fuck my brains out. LOL

How interesting is that? I mean I told her: I’m a player. I Fuck girls and never see them again. I date many girls at once. Bla blab la

She doesn’t care. She wants cock. This just goes to show – if they like you, they like you. It don’t make a lick of difference. Then again, hb_el is really enlightened and wise and sees things for what they are. She knows who I am really. So me fucking around with girls doesn’t lower me in her eyes. But, I guess it depends on the girl. If you tell every girl that shit some of them will undoubtedly kick you in the balls, and run away screaming.

It’s got me thinking tho, you know? Like… I dunno. It’s like I was just trying to fuck girls because I could? To get better at getting girls? I suppose that’s it. But now I feel like… I don’t really need to. Like I’m getting laid and I’m happy with my sex life with this girl so, what’s the point? I saw this smoking hottie yesterday. I ran back and opened her briefly. She stopped, as did her friend. I could have gone for it, but I was more interested in getting food with my friends than talking to this girl. I mean she was amazing. But I was hungry. This would have been unheard of 3 months ago. Really I should have gone for a superfast # close. I’ve thought about this before. Something like “hey, I’m sure you get billions of guys hitting on you all the time. I know this. But I’m awesome. Listen, take a crazy chance. Give me your number and I’ll give u call sometime…”

I think talk for 2 mins, just so she knows you’re not crazy and get the #. I know, I know. The flake rate is like 90% on this. But, isn’t there a way to do it where it won’t be so high? Does anyone know? Fak.

So … yea.. I didn’t do anything with her sexually. I managed not to even make out with her. Sure, there were some cuddling. I may have felt her titties up. And given her a naked back rub with her in her undies. And she gave me one (hey, she lost it in a poker game, fair and square) … but nothing happened.

Am I gay? Am I pussywhipped? Is HbKArate my GF now??

Once I’m actually sleeping with a girl and it’s good… what’s the point? I know fucking some other girl with a rubber will never compare. I won’t know her, wont have the chemistry, and I hate sex with condoms. So it becomes pure ego gratification. That’s a stupid reason to sleep with girls. It doesn’t actually make you a better man. Or a better person. Or closer to enlightenment. Unless, (as I suppose in my case) you have to go thru it to realize that’s not what you’re life is really about. That makes sense.

Perhaps I’m maturing and realizing I don’t have to sleep with every girl I can?

I dunno. I guess we’ll just see what happens….

Oh. That being said, she’s bisexual and is up for a threesome. Boo ya!

Maybe I haven’t matured that much…. :P