Worst blowjob ever

I just had the most unsatisfying experience ever

The black girl from a couple of week ago finally comes over. This is after loads of times saying she's going to come over, then not calling, or changing her mind and trying to get me to come over to hers, etc

If i'd have liked her, I would have been pissed off. But I didn't so i wasn't.

Just the same it's friday night, I don't feel like leaving the house. I'm being a KJ and typing articles and shit. She wants to come over, last minute, as usual. I tell her fine, come over

I'll be honest - the only reason i wanted her over was to get a blowjob. She has these amazing sexy thick lips. That's was literally the reason

she told me over the phone she wanted my cock in her mouth - cool!

Even though when i saw her the last time she acted with dismay at the suggestion of my getting a blowjob

just the same, she comes over.

get this. she calls me when she's outside telling me to come down

"Just come in, you know where I am"

"Oh I don't have enough money for the cab!"

I'm like WTF? Is this girl kidding me or what. I got in the elevator - but by the time i got to the bottom i just though "there's no fucking way this is happenning. she's going to hustle me to pay for the CAB?" So i just went back upstairs and called her and said "I don't have any money up here"(which actually i almost didn't)

She says "just borrow some from you flatmate" ... ack i'd told her he'd come home

now the NEXT level of game would have been to say "uh, he doesn't have any cash on him either. good luck, see you if you make it"

but i relented - went down there and gave her a tenner. it had come to 27 pounds and she had taken 20 from her house. she gives me the change and i say keep it, that she can give me a tenner later

she insists on going to the bank machine now. i know i'm never going to see her again already, so I agree

We walk about 5 mins to the bank machine. when we get there she informs me that she doesn't have her bank card. she puts on a bit show like she lost it and her oyster (buspass) card

Hmmmmm from the cab to here she lost it?? could someone REALLY be that disorganize?

why did she even take a cab, the underground goes straight to my house from the station nearest her.

It's not about the money - it's about the principle. SHE did a stupid thing, why should I pay for it?

Already I am completely turned off of this woman. i mean, i already was. She was calling me all week sometimes 3 times per day, telling me she wants me to be her boyfriend. I'm like i've met you TWICE. what are you on about? she tells me she wants my babies - at first i think she's kidding but she's really not. She tried to fuck me without a condom and tells me she wants to feel me cum inside of her.

She told me all sorts of things that really put me off her as a human being. do you KNOW how shit someone has to be for me not to even want to sLEEP with them? (ok not that bad - maybe i get put off easy)

but she told me how she won't go live with this one guy who offered to pay her rent because he lived in an area that was too far out. ok - not because she'd have to fuck him and be his live in girlfriend even though she didn't really like the guy, because it was in a postcode she didn't like. wow??!

Then she tells me how all her friends are gettin boob jobs. they're all like 20/21. I tried to explain to her that confidence comes from the inside and that getting bigger breasts are not really going to improve anyone's long term happiness - that this was not the solution to boost someone's confidence. That there were better ways.

She looked at me like I was from another planet.

she's selfish, stupid (genuinely stupid - not Monty Python stupid) immature and grossly selfish.

But wait -if i could JUST HOLD OUT for a BLOWJOB!!

It was the worst BJ of my life. she was just moving her lips up and down the shaft - she wouldn't even get NEAR the tip, nevermind putting it in her mouth. I say "you said you were going to give me a blowjob"

"I am" she replies

"no you're not!" I protest

"This IS a blowjob!" she states

"Oh no... I don't know what THAt is, but it certainly is NOT a blowjob!"

i sigh

"A blowjob involves some of my penis being in your mouth, at least some of the time!"

she tells me her gagging reflex comes up if she gets the taste of cemen in her mouth

I point out that i'm a man, i've tasted cemen and i didn't puke up (read prev blog entries if you don't know already)

she doesn't get the humour in my comment. big surprise.

I see my moment. My last words to her were

"Well, you'll never be my girlfriend. My girlfriend's give head"

She got dressed and she left.

Sweet. That was a lot easier to deliver than

"You're stupid, selfish, boring and immature. Piss off"

I need to just stay away from the crazies.

Even when they have massive tits.